All I Want


There is a time, when we laugh together, smile together and looking at each other in the eyes. There is a time, when i feel bored with you but still want to spend time with you. There is a time, when you secretly want me to be with you, and i don’t even know that. There is a time, when we spending time together with full of silence. No sounds, only sound of our very breath. We don’t speak at all. But i enjoyed that.

There is a time, when we together, is just another daily routine that has no meaning.

There is a time, when we separated, but we trust each other, and never doubted that.

At that time, i always want something more.

I want to be with you longer. I want to look at your eye and can’t find anything but the bless of God. I want to hold your hand with the love of God. I want us, to be united by our sacred vow: Marriage.

But i know, i have nothing for you. All the hard work that i have done so far, is meaningless in the face of your beautiful smile, kind heart, and that cute voice. I work so hard at what i do now, but still, that will never enough to be compared with you.

I want to have more power to hold you longer.

I want to have more knowledge to amaze you.

I want to have more haircut to make you proud of me. (yeah, you know, sometimes, man’s haircut is one thing that a girl will be proud of, right?)

But, who am i after all?

I’m just a mere human who have stupid desire to touch this living angel.

I know i am a fool. But still, i want it that way.

I am the man who experienced the cruelty of being dumped by his couple. I throw away all i have for one girl, then i know, that in the end, i am the one who being thrown away. I get my own trauma.

But you just gave my belief back. You are the only one that give me another hope in the world of love.

You, my lady, is the reason i -once again- believe in the meaning of love.

I made my mistake. And you do. But i know, mine is bigger. Still, i know well, that your heart is bigger than my mistake.

So, i just want to let you know, that all i want…

What i really-really want…

Is to be with you…

Once again. Everyday. Every morning with the scream of our child that need your appearance to make her/him calm. I want to go to the office every morning with your eye looking my back, and bless me with a pray that come from your wet lips. And unlike now, i will go home with more power, because i know, that no matter how late i’m back, you will always… always be there, at our little place that we called it home.

All i want is to be with you.

As simple as that.

This letter is written in my office, at the time when i miss you the most.

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